SYNOPSIS of When Pigs Fly.

Carter, Burns, and Dugan are three men not unlike some whom you know and love and live with. Not super heroes; but men with goals and aspirations and faults and temptations, loving wives and ex wives and children and divorces and breakdowns and success and memories and longing dreams and bad habits. Real men. The three are respectable but unrepentant middle aged reprobates who live in Newport, R.I., America's first resort.

Meanwhile, in the global power center of the solar system, his eminence U.S. President Horatio Plato Bell hosts the World Peace, Prosperity, and Quasi Environmental Conference, which is attended by diplomats and dignitaries from every nation in the world. The event is held in the cavernous convention hall of the Celestial Hotel, New York City's newest architectural marvel and now the tallest and most flamboyant building on planet Earth. To their immense surprise, World Peace is actually born in front of their eyes, and the conference delegates experience a seductive taste of spiritual bliss for the first time in their lives, although their politics and human nature prevents them from enjoying it very long. Paradise isn't a zip code they are familiar with.

At that very moment, Dugan's psychotic brother is employing an ingenious software device that allows him to merge with the digital feed of the www as a living avatar, physically able to inhabit any site on the internet. Radical terrorist Salaam bin Laden is martyred in Sudan, where the latest biblical plague adds to the afflictions of the refugees from Darfur; and a covert military expedition is launched by a top secret U.S. government agency to exterminate the wicked and save the suffering.

Meanwhile, Dugan is recruited by a mysterious, Über wealthy benefactor to undertake and fulfill an outrageous secret assignment. Their mission: to solve the famous curse of the Bambino. Dugan taps Carter and Burns, and they disembark on a wild journey, ultimately explaining how the Boston Red Sox finally win the World Series in dramatic fashion in 2004, after sports history's most celebrated eighty-six year drought. Along the way, the President of the United States is mysteriously kidnapped during the World Peace, Prosperity, and Quasi Environmental Conference, snatched with an otherwise innocent Russian who is a dead ringer for Boris Yeltzin. The New World Order is put on red alert, and international terrorists are presumed to be involved in this evil threat to our national security; although it is really the work of a secret society of the world's richest and most powerful, chaired by the reclusive Henry Bradford Davenport (Dugan's mysterious Über wealthy benefactor) as payment for his Faustian deal with the Devil.